Reading Recommendation

[lapsedagnostic]

I'm a navy brat, and I've always felt that was one of the largest elements that determined who I am. A few years ago a friend gave me this book, which is mostly interviews and case studies of eighty brats, with some interpretation and conclusions thrown in. It sucked, in that "stop fucking with my denial and coping mechanism" kinda way. It was very powerful for me, personally. It took me months, if not years, to get through the first chapter. I don't remember. It sat in my night stand, always waiting for me to pick it up and try to read chapter one again.

I finally got through it, and highlighted the most telling passages for my wife to read. It was very intense to learn where so many of my non-standard behavior mechanisms come from. If you're a brat, or you're involved with one, I'd advise reading this. It's not a feel good book by any sense, but it's pretty good at explaining the cause and effects.

Military Brats: Legacies of Childhood Inside the Fortress

Comments

[bittibuddha.livejournal.com]

I was thinking about this the other day Quas. My last "military" move was when I was about 12, so I spent the rest of my adolescence and teenage years in one home-base in Virginia. When was your last move? I wonder because Im sure that the older the kids get, the harder it must be to adapt. When I was little, it was never an issue... it just "what we did."

[lapsedagnostic.livejournal.com]

My last move was from Iran to Southern Maryland when I was about to turn thirteen, but my dad stayed in the Navy for another six years.

I think by that time my personality was pretty set; I never really fit into school society. (But that's what everyone says about middle school.)

[bittibuddha.livejournal.com]

really?? Really? your personality was "set" by the time you were 13?

whoa. I would have thought it would have been a few more years.

[lapsedagnostic.livejournal.com]

I think we need to make sure that we're using the same defination of "personality".

By that age, though, I was introverted, good at making acquaintenances, bad at making friends, had already formed the basis for my "type" of females, had set my sense of humor, my laziness and my cleverness that i sued to counter act it, with issues with authority, my trouble with finishing projects, my social anxiety.

I think all these elements were there by the time I turned 13. Were they completely set? No. But definately there in some form or another.

Hell, I don't consider myself to actually have become sentient until my late twenties, until then I pretty much purely reacted to my environment.

[bittibuddha.livejournal.com]

Hell, I don't consider myself to actually have become sentient until my late twenties, until then I pretty much purely reacted to my environment.

~ding~

THAT was what I was looking for, actually... hell: if I thought for a moment that my entire life was based on my 13 year old paradigm, I would have run screaming off a bridge by now.

mkay. Im content. please carry on.

[fairerhiannon.livejournal.com]

I remember you telling me about this.

Thank you for the info!

~Army Brat here!

[grandmasterkim.livejournal.com]

Interesting. I will have to pick this up. I am an air force brat myself.

[lapsedagnostic.livejournal.com]

Definately read it. It explains pretty much my entire social interaction style. As fucked up as that is.

And it might explain why you're so kick-ass at video games.

Re: I'm one too.

[lapsedagnostic.livejournal.com]

I'm not surprise, in fact I think you told me you were one way back then.

But, just so you know, reading the book sucks. Like few things do. But worth it, very much so.

*waves*

[pyrategrrl.livejournal.com]

Me 4? Me 5?

*G* our last move was my senior year in college... back to MD from Cape May, NJ... (dad was a 30 year man)

the last of oh..*8* familial moves, starting at 2 weeks old, and ending at ..er... 23.

Every 4 years i have this urge to box up all my belongings...

(thanks for the Amazon link, *smooch*)